Mr Speaker

Mr Speaker lives!

Phewwwweeee.

You have no idea how close this URL came to not existing. Of ALL the URLs not existing! Sit back and let me tell you a tale of how I almost let mrspeaker.net - the cornerstone of the Mr Speaker (tm) Corporation - be erased from the existance.

The story begins not long after a certain global pandemic (yes, the one you're thinking of) did. The location: New. York. City. A once-vibrant metropolis, reduced to an avian paradise. No more car horns. No more loud-talkers in cafes.

It was a morning like any other.

I sipped on a coffee (supplies still high) and flipped through my emails - unwaware of the dance with doom that was about to unfold. Amongst the spam ("spam" is my name for all emails) there was one from my hosting provider. It said: "You gotta pay your bills but your credit card just expired. Update it if you want people to continue enjoying the delightful antics of your blog.".

"I'll do that" I said, taking another sip of coffee. "a bit later."

A bit later

It had been weeks since I'd ran out of coffee, and things had been grim. But a fresh supply arrived on my doorstep: and a glimmer of sunshine fell over the city. With a renewed spring in my step (not my actual step - I'd stopped moving entirely by then) I decided I had kept my web site down long enough, and my fans would be ravenous for its return. I decided to update my credit card details.

It was not to be so simple.

Consulting the chain of "you really ought to pay your bills" emails I noticed - buried in the middle of the stack - a single sentence that read: "mrspeaker.net is expiring today".

Today?! "Today" was like... weeks ago! How many weeks? Unsure.

An electric tingle-of-dread surged through me as I understood the implication: it wasn't just my site was down... I'd let my beloved, nearly 20 year-old domain be cast back into the global pool of crappy leftover - where it would no doubt be captured by a smelly domain-squatter. My life's work smashed and converted to a link farm. The least useful kind of farm!

Anyhoo

Don't worry, I got it back. Some quick action on my hosting provider's part pulled the domain name out of suspension with just moments to spare.

The End.

(P.S. If someone could ping me in 11.5 months time and remind me to renew my domain name I promise I'll read your email. Thanks.)